The Second Time Around

I really don't know what to say right now except...in 18 days I will be the mother of not one, but TWO boys!  I am excited and nervous and just full of wonder.  What is the second time around going to be like?  Before, I had nothing to compare anything to...now I find myself wondering all the time - will this boy look like his big brother?  Will he be as good-natured?  Will he sleep through the night at 6 weeks like his brother did? (Please, God, say yes!!).

I don't know how the boys will differ from each other, but I do know there are some things I intend to do differently this time around.  Hindsight, is they say, 20/20.  With Joshua, the nurses told me I was "slacking" when I didn't wake him up like clockwork every 2-3 hours to nurse him...but oh my goodness I was TIRED!  And he was sleeping.  And it just seemed really horrible when I was exhausted (and he was apparently also!) to wake him up and try to feed him (when in reality, that wasn't such a smooth process at the beginning either!).  This time, I will be feeding my boy when he is hungry and letting him sleep if he's sleepy.  Come on, babies for generations have been raised that way and have all done FINE!  Obviously, if he starts to lose too much weight or something I will do what I have to do, but I think those nurses made me think he was going to die if I didn't put him to the breast every 2.5 hours on the dot.  Geez didn't they think I had enough worries going through my mind already!?

Also, I feel I have more confidence about keeping a baby alive and well this time.  It may have been some baby blues in the first two weeks last time, but I seriously remember thinking:  Can I really do this?  Did I bite off more than I can chew here?  I know it's going to be a lot of work this time around as well (DOUBLE the work, really), but I will have lots of help and I know in my heart I can do this.  And if, after a few days at home I should start to forget this fact, I will report directly back to this blog post and take a deep breath and affirm what I do know is true in my heart:  These boys are my gifts from God, whom He entrusted to me, and He doesn't make mistakes!